The Sorrow Beneath the Water
I was cleaning out some old boxes of documents and found this snippet. It is a fictionalized account of the day of my miscarriage. It needs some work, but I think it has potential as the kernel of a horror story (which is where I think I was going with it). What do you think?
The Sorrow Beneath the Water
She remembers the shock of sorrow as she wraps another mug with old newspaper. Lying there on that cold bed in that cold room looking at the barely formed image on the screen of the new dead fetus, curled up with a heart that beats no more.
On that day, the world imploded.
On that day, she was sucked into a black hole that was now tugging at her as she packed her things to move.
Soon she would start afresh. But today she had to pack and, apparently, release the never to be born child.
The cramps came slowly, like scouts checking out the territory. The kitchen was done by the time the pain made her take notice.
She walked into the living room where her best friend was helping her pack.
“It’s time,” she said.
“Already?”
She nodded and placed her hand on her belly. The life was gone, but the soul was nearby.
Thank you for this devotional. This will be my first Thanksgiving & Christmas without my mother. She passed away this past June after being sick for almost a year and in ICU for 68 days. Between myself, my two sisters and daddy, she was never alone in the hospital. We miss her everyday but know she is with her Heavenly Father now. We are so blessed to know she had a personal relationship with Him! Some days I have to cling to God’s word to be reminded of His peace and blessings. Thank you again.
Today is mother’s day … so I wonder, if you have a miscarriage as your only pregnancy, are you a mother? I think not, but some have told me otherwise. I did feel a mother’s love, although it was for, at the time, a semi-amorphous blob with a beating tube-heart on an ultrasound screen. Hmmmmm.