Back in 1994, I was toying with the idea of giving a speech in Toastmasters on my various adventures in babysitting. What follows is a draft of that speech. I just unearthed it as I was tooling around my hard drive looking for something else. It still needs polishing, but it has some funny moments.
This weekend I saw Son of Godzilla. It was actually quite entertaining. I think what I found the most special about this particular Godzilla movie were the scenes of Godzilla teaching his child. Scenes of parenthood always seem to move me.
Although I am not a parent, I’ve been in training since I was five years old. That is when my sister was born.
At the age of 13, I got my first babysitting job. I’ve never been the same since.
Child-sitting can be exhilarating, joyous and fun. It can also be scary and adventurous. Your metal can tested during just three hours with a child.
The trials of child-sitting can be minor or great. One time, a three year old I was sitting was going through a time of nightmares. The parents neglected to tell me this. That night, she got up out of bed crying for her mother. Her mother wasn’t going to be there for a few more hours, and the child really needed to get to sleep. I ended up sitting in a rocking chair with her in may arms for over an hour.
The same child claimed to be potty trained. She came up to me and said she had to go to the bathroom. Well, I’d never dealt with this before. So I took her to the bathroom and helped her take off her pants. She then proceeded to piss all over the floor with out getting up on the toilet. ACK!!!! “Stop! Get on the toilet! AAAAAA!” I ended up having to change her clothes and clean the bathroom floor.
Not all of the things that happen while sitting are so bad. I usually have a great time playing with the child. It is amazing how complex a 2 or 3 year old’s personality can be. Of course I’ve never quite grown up. I enjoy playing with children’s toys. And children say the funniest things!